Stress has been the topic of the last few weeks. Stress and stress removal. Things have been shifting back and forth between being completely stressed out and being completely relaxed. Full tilt to full rest. Sleep, when it comes, is sporadic and always ends awkwardly. It frequently ends with spikes of stress and anger and disappointment. There are plenty of ways to get to sleep. What can help you wake up correctly? The stress seemed endless for weeks. Nothing to do but wait on others to do what they needed to do. The source of the stress ended today, finally bringing an end to weeks of frustration, anger, depression, and pressure. Will sleep come? Will it end happily or awkwardly?
Exercise has felt pointless. Writing was just the same things repeating over and over, an endless stream of anger and frustration. It wasn’t even therapeutic, just annoying and saddening. There wasn’t any escape from the stress. All my typical relief valves were cut off. Nothing to do but let it build and build.
Tomorrow I will run and I will write. It’s time to flush this stress out of my system. Burn it away, write it down, capture it, contain it, and crush it. There’s always a way to flush the stress. The more I wash away, the more I burn off, the more I release, the better I’ll feel.
I don’t always realize how much stress I store up within myself. We’re supposed to be like wires, letting the stress flow through us and not holding onto it. Instead we’re like batteries, letting it build up and releasing it slowly. Too much stress coming in and we start to break down rather than dumping as much as we can. We have to find a way to release our stress, to give it form and function and use. Otherwise it starts to eat us.
The Quick, Not The Dead 